Brangelevon

In a remote African village, the hottest couple on the planet spill the beans to the hottest celebrity interviewer on the planet, about the hottest baby joy on the planet. It's hot.

I’ve interviewed some of the biggest names on the planet and some of the biggest faces. I even interviewed the world’s biggest man once- he was gigantic, but delightful to be around. But nothing can ever quite prepare you for the excitement of interviewing the most white hot couple on the planet. These two make ‘Bennifer’ seem like a pair of losers who met at a speed dating night. I’m talking of course, about Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie!

Devon: Wow is it hot in Africa or am I sitting in front of the steamiest couple on the planet?

Brad Pitt: It’s hot in Africa.

Angelina Jolie: And it’s only going to get hotter if we don’t address the issue of climate change.

DQ: Of course. That’s a very important issue Angelina. But so is the news that you’re having TWINS!

BP: Thanks, we’re very excited.

DQ: It was probably Ange’s ‘twins’ that attracted you to her in the first place Brad, am I right?

BP: I beg your pardon?

DQ: Her... her twins. I’m sorry I was trying to be ‘blokey’ with you.

BP: By commenting on my pregnant wife’s breasts to me? While she’s sitting here?

DQ: I want you both to like me. This interview is a pretty big deal to me. Career wise. Can we just pretend I didn’t say that thing about Ange’s breasts?



AJ: Sure, just put your manners back in Devon.

DQ: Of course. Won’t happen again. So, you’re having twins. That’s so amazing. Jennifer Lopez just had twins, did you ever consider just adopting her babies?

BP: Hey!



AJ: That’s a pretty offensive remark.

DQ: Is it? Well I’m sorry I thought that might get a laugh. My readers are fairly low brow. They’re idiots. Can we keep going Ange?

BP: You got one more chance buddy and that’s it. Make it a good one.

DQ: Wow. Pressure from Brad Pitt! What a day. I’m the meat in a ‘Brangelina’ sandwich. Little old Devon Quince...if my old school friends could see me now...I’m talking to fast aren’t I? I’m RUINING the interview. Get ahold of yourself Devon, they’re just people, they’re not perfect....Brad made ‘Ocean’s 12’ for God’s sake and Angelina did that awful ‘Lara Croft’ sequel. Relax man and just treat them like two human beings.

BP: Excuse me, is there a question here?

DQ: There most certainly is. Brad, it’s so great to see you settled as part of the Brangelina phenomenon. It must be so much more grounding than when you were in ‘Gwyn-Pitt’, or ‘Bra-JulietteLewis’ or...who are some other people you’ve slept with? Help me out with some names.

BP: Goodbye.

(Brad and Angelina storm out.)

DQ: Is it morning sickness Ange? Are you coming back? Following this interview, I sent the power-couple my screenplay for ‘Mr and Mrs Smith 2’, but I’m still awaiting a reply.