Miranda stalked in the city

With the long awaited 'Sex and the City Movie' about to hit our screens, Devon Quince catches up with his fourth favourite cast member (aka the red haired one).

I don't want to bitch, but once again I've been refused an interview with the star of a new movie. The 'Sex and the City Movie' is going to be huge but Sarah Jessica Parker's people were like "Devon who?". It was so insulting. Luckily after much stalking, I finally spotted a familiar shade of red hair in a hotel lobby.

DEVON QUINCE: HOLD THE LIFT! Hold the lift please... thank you.

[CYNTHIA NIXON holds the door open and DEVON runs in to the elevator beside her.]

CYNTHIA NIXON: Which floor?

DQ: [breathing heavily] Um... you choose.

CN: What?

DQ: I'm sorry. I ran - for the lift - and I'm out - of breath now.

CN: Are you OK?

DQ: Yes, yes. I'm Devon Quince, celebrity interviewer. Can I ask you some questions?

CN: Let go of my arm.

DQ: Of course. I'm sorry. I thought I was gonna pass out from the running.

CN: You're freaking me out.

DQ: I beg you. The press agents don't call me back. Please.

CN: So this is how you do business? In elevators?

DQ: Yes. Sometimes it's the only way.

CN: You mean this has worked for you?

DQ: I did it to the guy who played Chewbacca and he beat the crap out of me all the way to the 37th floor of this office building. Actually it turned out it wasn't even the guy who played Chewbacca. It was just a really huge, angry guy.

[The elevator stops and the door opens]

CN: This is my floor. You stay here.

DQ: I was planning on following you for a while. I have a couple of questions about the new movie.

CN: GO AWAY!

DQ: So what can fans expect from the 'Sex and the City Movie’?

CN: Get back in the elevator or I'll kick you in the balls so hard, I swear to Christ!

DQ: Please don't. Just tell me quickly - any romance for Carrie in the film?

[CYNTHIA NIXON kicks DEVON, hard, in the groin. DEVON collapses back in to the elevator.]

DQ: Don't walk away Cynthia! Why do you call him Mr Big? Please tell me!

[The elevator doors slam shut on DEVON'S head.]

Devon Quince was released from hospital several days later. He released a statement that said, "Cynthia Nixon was such a difficult interview subject, I refuse to interview anybody else from the 'Sex and the City Movie' even if they beg me." So far, no one has begged him.