Royal schm-oyal

Terri Psiakis remains unimpressed by Princess Mary's recent royal visit downunder.

Ever since Crown Princess Mary flew in to Tasmania on Jetstar, she’s been labelled the no-pomp princess. Let me let you in on a secret: the only reason she flew Jetstar is because the word Qantas means ‘death-trap’ in Danish.

I don’t get it. She’s got squillions. What’s with the budget airline? Fact is, she booked out the entire front section of the plane. With amount that cost, she probably could have flown first class. What’s more, she travelled with 18 pieces of luggage. And not one piece ended up in Perth. If that’s not getting special treatment, I don’t know what is.

Reporters and photographers then went nuts when Mary went to a chemist in Hobart to stock up on nappies for her kids. I know there’s probably not much else happening in Tasmania but it made the news all over the country. Who gets papped buying nappies? I’m positively outraged. I buy nappies from my chemist regularly and New Weekly hasn’t snapped me once. Sure I don’t actually have kids and I’m not famous but I let NW know when I’m going to be there and everything.

Here’s the thing: I could understand the hysteria if Princess Mary was a bona fide international celebrity, but she’s not. She’s a Tasmanian girl who married a fancy pants guy, moved overseas and came back for a visit. The excitement level’s too high. Everybody calm down before someone has an aneurism.

It’d be different if it was Angelina Jolie being photographed buying nappies from a chemist in Hobart. That’d be far more exciting, mainly because it would suggest that her adoption of a Tasmanian baby was imminent.

I’m not sure why we’re meant to be so excited about Princess Mary. Princess schm-incess, I reckon. I give her two regal waves out of five.